Yes, the war was good for the private detective business. It brought in money, opportunity and more than a little greed. Now the war's over and people come to Los Angeles because they think the money's easy and the women are easier. That's a combination that's good for any business; particularly the divorce business.

Some of these nominees even try to make detective work seem classy to attract a few more bucks, but in the end they are all peeking through the same keyholes. Everyone, sometime in their life has a bit of distress. Some hire private detectives just because they're lonely and need a little extra company, if you get my meaning.



Some became kind of famous. Now it doesn't make you any better than the next dick, but it sure beats working hard for a living. After a while the gravy-train makes you a little soft, and you know what money and fame can do to some limitedly talented people like….Paula Abdul.


Yes, they're all here at the Fillmore Plaza in their tuxedos and gowns, so someone can be awarded the "Detective of the Year", trophy. And, tonight the 'Big Dick' will go to someone. It all seems a little silly to me too, But isn't this what this dinner play is all about?



It's time to get this gala started. This could be an outstanding Sally Fields moment for one of these nominees.